Hello, everyone! This is a quick post to recognize that today is the 10-year anniversary of the RetroBeliever blog! I was perusing my old posts and went as far back as the first one, which is here:
https://retrobeliever.blogspot.com/2010/01/welcome-to-retrobeliever.html
Since that first post, the blog has changed quite a bit. Initially, I focused on retro videogames from a Christian perspective, but I have since extended my reach into board games and popular U.S. culture. More often than not, my posts have tended towards a nostalgic perspective because what I write generally comes from looking backwards. Over the last few years, I have gravitated a lot more towards board games and rules, so I'm intrigued by the possibilities of what I may post in the future.
As of this date, my focus has been on loss, death, and being lost. Many of my thoughts have dwelled on those subjects because of recent events and what seems to be a mid-life crisis I am experiencing. I am at a point where I am fairly convinced I have already lived more than half of my life on this earth. It has caused me to cling to God desperately, and yet I feel sadness at how meaningless many of my pursuits will be when I have left this earth. In heaven, board games, video games, movies, TV shows, and even the fond remembrances of the past won't necessarily matter. What will matter, though, are the connections I made with people through those interests and events and whether or not I impacted them in the name of Jesus. Everything else is ephemeral.
I look at my 16- and 14-year-old sons and ponder the future ahead of them. There is some much for them to experience. If I were to die today, I would want them to know that I love them dearly and want the best for them on this earth, as well as for them to be in the presence of God in eternity. I pray that they can live their lives while making wise decisions and avoiding egregious mistakes and sins. I know that many of us learn through tragedy and error, but, as a father, I would prefer that they would not have to face many of those situations.
I am thankful for my wife, though I am not worthy of her. She is spiritually stronger than me and more inclined to read her Bible daily and pray. She leads her women's group with compassion and fairness. She yearns for the best for our sons to the point of physical pain. There is a part of me that would have wanted a better husband for her, but God had a plan when He put me in her path. She has made me better, yet I am woefully inadequate.
Lastly, with loving respect of my mom, I want to mention my dad, who passed away over three years ago. On the day before he died, I prayed with my dad and he indicated with nods that he gave his life to the Lord. If, in the entirety of my life, I could lead one person to Christ, it would have been my dad. Of course, I pray the same for my mom, but my dad seemed much further from God. When he died, I was stricken with grief, yet I was filled with hope that I will meet him again.
Thank you for reading my blog posts. You may have read one, or you may have read many, but I am grateful, nonetheless. I write these posts for an audience of one hoping that others happen upon them. May your gaming be fun and eternally purposeful!
Showing posts with label wife. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wife. Show all posts
Monday, January 27, 2020
Wednesday, November 21, 2018
What to Do If... No One Wants to Play Your Game
Imagine this scenario: last week, a new game was released at your local game store. You had been excited to acquire it since seven months ago when the first press release announced its impending arrival. With great anticipation, you sped to the game store on the day of release and gobbled up the first copy (as well as all of the necessary card sleeves and containers for tokens, if you are anything like me). You spent a few hours sleeving cards, punching boards, and sorting the contents, relishing each component and piece of superlative artwork. You even found a place of great esteem on your game shelf for your new acquisition.
As you placed your shiny new box in its designated spot, your mind began racing. Who would I invite to play this game for the first time? Who would be available? Who would not be interested? Hurriedly, you bursted forth from your bedroom with notepad in hand, feverishly jotting down names. With your short list of would-be enthusiasts, you flung open your laptop computer, toggled to your email client software, and clicked New to create an email. You added the names, typed the message with urgent intensity, and clicked Send. Your email shot forth like a cannon blast. Then, you waited. And waited. And waited.
"Sorry, I can't play. I have to wash my dog."
"That game? No thanks. Why not play Power Grid?"
"That game looks way too complicated."
"My wife wants me to spend time with her."
"Ugh. I just bought a new game, too. Do you want to play that one?"
Obviously, the enthusiasm for your new game is decidedly low. You are despondent. You begin pondering your life goals. You resort to prayer. Things do not look good... What do you do? Well, there are solutions, some of which you may have already devised, but some might have escaped your attention.
Bring Your New Game to a Larger Gathering
From time to time, your friends might host a large gathering during which games can be played. Use that time to introduce yourself (if there are people who are strangers to you) and your game. Strangers are often the best people to whom you can introduce a game because they have no preconceived notions about you or what you brought.
Entice Your Friends with Food
The fastest way to a gamer's heart is through his stomach. Set up an invitation to play your particular game, and then advertise that you are providing pizza, burritos, or whatever your friends enjoy. This establishes a quid pro quo situation in which you are giving something (food) and getting something (opponents for your game) in return.
Enlist Your Captive Audience... er, Family
A great way to get your new game to the table is to make your family play it. Spouses are difficult to convince, but your children (or nieces and nephews) are impressionable, pliable, and usually more amenable to playing a new game than anyone else. Take to time to know the rules of your new game and practice teaching it to yourself so that you can prepare for training your children and young relatives.
Ultimatums!
A not-so-subtle variation of the quid pro quo arrangement is the ultimatum: "If you don't play my new game, I won't play yours next time!" Now, this kind of forceful declaration must be done with great care and humor, and can even be off-putting for your more thick-skinned friends, but a kind reminder that you are agreeing to play someone else's new game may compel your comrades to partake in your game. However, if they do not agree to play your new game despite your efforts to play theirs, then you may have to consider other options: patience, non-attendance to future sessions, or finding a new game group.
Find a New Group
As I mentioned in previous posts, they may come a time when you need to find a new game group. Of course, leaving your current group forever simply because they would not play your game is extreme and childish ("Fine! I'll take my ball home and you guys can't play with it!"), but their refusal to play your new game may be symptomatic of deeper issues. Perhaps someone in your group has an issue with you and his grudge has affected the group; maybe your group has collectively soured to each other's company. Instead of ditching your old group entirely, find another group at the local game store, at work, or at your church who would be open to meeting. It is fine to be a member of multiple groups, and looking for a fresh group of people with open minds has the ancillary benefit of creating chances to play your recent acquisition.
Be Patient and Plant Seeds
This may not seem like a solution because patience changes nothing in the moment, and it is the most difficult thing to do, but waiting for the opportunity and planting seeds of interest in your friends' minds is often the best approach. Some gamers like familiarity with a game, so they prefer playing a known game and not having to dive into rules explanations, which is why presenting a new game can be a daunting endeavor. For these folks, instead of the brute force tactic of forcing a game on your group, drop hints about it during your next play session. Spend a few weeks reading the rules and shoehorning comments about it every time you meet people in your group. Point out reviews on Board Game Geek or other sites. Talk about how the game's mechanics are like other popular games, but the theme of your game makes those mechanics feel fresh. The process may take a few weeks, but keep trying and, eventually, your gaming group will relent... even if it is to silence you at last.
Find Solo Rules Variants for Your Game
One of the many wonderful aspects of sites like Board Game Geek is the pooling of ideas that people have formulated on their own, especially solo variants for games. Though some games have rules for playing alone in the core rules (such as Robinson Crusoe, First Martians, Le Havre, and Agricola), most games do not benefit from this extra development on the part of the game designer. However, there are folks out there that have taken the time to devise a kind of artificial intelligence for your game so that tasks are essentially automated as if you are playing against a computer. Solo play does require much work on your part to move pieces, draw cards, and follow what can be complex algorithms simulating other players, but playing solo may be preferable to never playing your new game or doing what I am about to suggest...
Sell (or Store) the Game
The last resort is to either store the game and consider it a collectible, or sell the game on eBay or to other gamers. There is no point in keeping a game no one will play (unless you are content with collecting games), so consider selling it to buy expansions for games that your friends play. To avoid this altogether, though, even before buying a game, think about whether or not your friends and/or family will play it.
Before you attempt any of these solutions, there are a few requirements that you must satisfy:
Despite my suggestions, I believe that the best approach is thinking about your friendly opponents and what they would want before you buy a game. For me, I often think about my wife and sons: would they play the game I'm thinking of buying? A few years ago, my sons had the time and desire to play pretty much anything I bought, but now they are teenagers and their tastes have changed. My wife is much more selective, so I try to pick some games she would not mind playing. Also, because I no longer have to kind of gaming group I had at my previous job, I have to think about my old games and how often I can get them to the table; when I do think about that, I am often convinced to not buy a new game.
Furthermore, I encourage you to think about your current inventory of games and ponder how often you would like to play your existing games. The board gaming hobby is heavily steeped in a "cult of the new" mentality in which gamers are often excited to purchase the hottest novelties. This may be you, and if you have the money to engage in this, then I am happy for you. Yet, if you really enjoy your old games and would like to play them more often, reconsider that purchase you want to make. In this way, perhaps the best solution for what to do if no one will play your new game is to not buy that new game... Or, if you have already bought it, take it back to the store and buy some pizzas to tempt your friends and family to go to your house and play games with which they are already familiar.
As you placed your shiny new box in its designated spot, your mind began racing. Who would I invite to play this game for the first time? Who would be available? Who would not be interested? Hurriedly, you bursted forth from your bedroom with notepad in hand, feverishly jotting down names. With your short list of would-be enthusiasts, you flung open your laptop computer, toggled to your email client software, and clicked New to create an email. You added the names, typed the message with urgent intensity, and clicked Send. Your email shot forth like a cannon blast. Then, you waited. And waited. And waited.
"Sorry, I can't play. I have to wash my dog."
"That game? No thanks. Why not play Power Grid?"
"That game looks way too complicated."
"My wife wants me to spend time with her."
"Ugh. I just bought a new game, too. Do you want to play that one?"
Obviously, the enthusiasm for your new game is decidedly low. You are despondent. You begin pondering your life goals. You resort to prayer. Things do not look good... What do you do? Well, there are solutions, some of which you may have already devised, but some might have escaped your attention.
Bring Your New Game to a Larger Gathering
From time to time, your friends might host a large gathering during which games can be played. Use that time to introduce yourself (if there are people who are strangers to you) and your game. Strangers are often the best people to whom you can introduce a game because they have no preconceived notions about you or what you brought.
Entice Your Friends with Food
The fastest way to a gamer's heart is through his stomach. Set up an invitation to play your particular game, and then advertise that you are providing pizza, burritos, or whatever your friends enjoy. This establishes a quid pro quo situation in which you are giving something (food) and getting something (opponents for your game) in return.
Enlist Your Captive Audience... er, Family
A great way to get your new game to the table is to make your family play it. Spouses are difficult to convince, but your children (or nieces and nephews) are impressionable, pliable, and usually more amenable to playing a new game than anyone else. Take to time to know the rules of your new game and practice teaching it to yourself so that you can prepare for training your children and young relatives.
Ultimatums!
A not-so-subtle variation of the quid pro quo arrangement is the ultimatum: "If you don't play my new game, I won't play yours next time!" Now, this kind of forceful declaration must be done with great care and humor, and can even be off-putting for your more thick-skinned friends, but a kind reminder that you are agreeing to play someone else's new game may compel your comrades to partake in your game. However, if they do not agree to play your new game despite your efforts to play theirs, then you may have to consider other options: patience, non-attendance to future sessions, or finding a new game group.
Find a New Group
As I mentioned in previous posts, they may come a time when you need to find a new game group. Of course, leaving your current group forever simply because they would not play your game is extreme and childish ("Fine! I'll take my ball home and you guys can't play with it!"), but their refusal to play your new game may be symptomatic of deeper issues. Perhaps someone in your group has an issue with you and his grudge has affected the group; maybe your group has collectively soured to each other's company. Instead of ditching your old group entirely, find another group at the local game store, at work, or at your church who would be open to meeting. It is fine to be a member of multiple groups, and looking for a fresh group of people with open minds has the ancillary benefit of creating chances to play your recent acquisition.
Be Patient and Plant Seeds
This may not seem like a solution because patience changes nothing in the moment, and it is the most difficult thing to do, but waiting for the opportunity and planting seeds of interest in your friends' minds is often the best approach. Some gamers like familiarity with a game, so they prefer playing a known game and not having to dive into rules explanations, which is why presenting a new game can be a daunting endeavor. For these folks, instead of the brute force tactic of forcing a game on your group, drop hints about it during your next play session. Spend a few weeks reading the rules and shoehorning comments about it every time you meet people in your group. Point out reviews on Board Game Geek or other sites. Talk about how the game's mechanics are like other popular games, but the theme of your game makes those mechanics feel fresh. The process may take a few weeks, but keep trying and, eventually, your gaming group will relent... even if it is to silence you at last.
Find Solo Rules Variants for Your Game
One of the many wonderful aspects of sites like Board Game Geek is the pooling of ideas that people have formulated on their own, especially solo variants for games. Though some games have rules for playing alone in the core rules (such as Robinson Crusoe, First Martians, Le Havre, and Agricola), most games do not benefit from this extra development on the part of the game designer. However, there are folks out there that have taken the time to devise a kind of artificial intelligence for your game so that tasks are essentially automated as if you are playing against a computer. Solo play does require much work on your part to move pieces, draw cards, and follow what can be complex algorithms simulating other players, but playing solo may be preferable to never playing your new game or doing what I am about to suggest...
Sell (or Store) the Game
The last resort is to either store the game and consider it a collectible, or sell the game on eBay or to other gamers. There is no point in keeping a game no one will play (unless you are content with collecting games), so consider selling it to buy expansions for games that your friends play. To avoid this altogether, though, even before buying a game, think about whether or not your friends and/or family will play it.
Before you attempt any of these solutions, there are a few requirements that you must satisfy:
- Learn Your Game
Read the rules again and again before even attempting to introduce it. - Practice Teaching the Game
Brainstorm ideas of how you would teach the game and organize those ideas into a chronological outline. Use your outline to practice teaching the game, perhaps to a family member or just to yourself. - Organize Your Components
Have every component of the game organized so that they are easily accessed without wasting valuable game time hunting for them. - Anticipate Player Counts and Set Aside the Requisite Components
Some games' setups stipulate how much of any items you need for certain player counts. Instead of counting out tokens and cards at the start of the gaming session, use plastic bags to separate the required items beforehand so that setup is accelerated. - Know the Comparable Games
One thing that assuages fears of learning a new game is drawing parallels to existing games with similar mechanics. This further requires knowing your gaming group, but sticking with popular games helps. Here is one example: "My new game has a set collection mechanic, much like the way you collect cards in Ticket to Ride." Also, mentioning that similar games can be found at Target, Barnes and Noble, or other popular retailers sends the message that your new game is not that strange or difficult to learn because games like it are readily available.
Despite my suggestions, I believe that the best approach is thinking about your friendly opponents and what they would want before you buy a game. For me, I often think about my wife and sons: would they play the game I'm thinking of buying? A few years ago, my sons had the time and desire to play pretty much anything I bought, but now they are teenagers and their tastes have changed. My wife is much more selective, so I try to pick some games she would not mind playing. Also, because I no longer have to kind of gaming group I had at my previous job, I have to think about my old games and how often I can get them to the table; when I do think about that, I am often convinced to not buy a new game.
Furthermore, I encourage you to think about your current inventory of games and ponder how often you would like to play your existing games. The board gaming hobby is heavily steeped in a "cult of the new" mentality in which gamers are often excited to purchase the hottest novelties. This may be you, and if you have the money to engage in this, then I am happy for you. Yet, if you really enjoy your old games and would like to play them more often, reconsider that purchase you want to make. In this way, perhaps the best solution for what to do if no one will play your new game is to not buy that new game... Or, if you have already bought it, take it back to the store and buy some pizzas to tempt your friends and family to go to your house and play games with which they are already familiar.
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Why Families Need Board Games, Part I
As we all conducted our individual games, I found time to patrol the tables and monitor how people were adapting to the new games. I was pleasantly surprised to see that many of the parents and children were learning the games quickly and engrossing themselves in the nuances of each one. The little ones at my Balloon Lagoon tables were especially eager to play a second round, which I certainly allowed them to do. Another child had even taken it upon himself to start another group game of Ticket to Ride, which he had brought to teach others. Thus, the first round of gaming ended well as we all headed into a break, which was when I observed and realized an "inconvenient truth..."
The plan for the evening was to conduct a second round of gaming during which some of the young ones would teach their own favorite board games to the adults. However, as Round 2 was set to commence, it was painfully clear that almost all of the children no longer had any interest in playing board games. Some of them migrated to another room to play with Beyblades; a few boys went upstairs to pillow fight; and several other children seemed to wander around shooting Nerf guns. It was then that I grasped a basic notion: most kids have short attention spans. This wasn't an earth-shattering discovery, but what struck me was that while my sons were open to the idea of more board games, the other kids were not so eager, which led to the earth-shattering discovery:
Many people today have trouble with board games!
Why is that? I pondered the reasons for these children (and adults) not being eager to dive into another round of more profound strategic thinking and discovery. Maybe, it's because people are used to the audiovisual splendor and attention-sapping energy of video games; maybe, it's because board games take time to set up and play; maybe, it's because people are just too busy or distracted to play board games. It could even be because people are too "plugged into" their mobile devices and tablets to shut them off and actually touch tangible game elements. These reasons and others have swirled around in my head for some time after that game meeting, and I contend that all of the reasons I listed are acceptable ones.Yet, I have a better, more over-arching reason for why many kids (and even adults) cannot sit for an extended period of time and play a board game even though those same people can sit and play video or computer games for hours:
The "world" wants us to be plugged in and reliant on technology for entertainment, business, and our very livelihoods.
The "world" is corporations that want to sell us goods with built-in obsolescence so that we buy more in three to five years. The "world" is the entertainment industry (Hollywood, if you will) that wants us to buy its mind-numbing, non-life-affirming movies, its vapid, insipid popular music, and its haughtily amoral television shows. The "world" is video and computer game makers that only seek to satiate and enthrall while promoting sexuality, violence, and unimaginative, profane abuses of language. The "world" tells us we are not smart enough to think on our own, to conduct daily life without technology, and the "world" tells us that we must always be having its brand of "fun" or else life is awful. We are all being shaped by this "world" and the incursions and invasions this "world" has masterminded against our psyches are methodically reshaping us into thrill-seeking, attention-lacking, over-multi-tasked consumers sans a moral compass.
How do we stop the "world" from transforming us into lemmings? One way is through board games.
(To be continued)
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