What to Do If... A Game is Just So Adorable?!

Castles of Burgundy is widely considered one of the best strategy games in the board game hobby and designer Stefan Feld's masterpiece. Ranked at 19 on Board Game Geek's website, Castles of Burgundy combines dice, tile placement, and lots of ways to score to form a tight puzzle of a game with just enough player interaction not to feel like you are playing Solitaire on an airplane tray table. If you have not had a chance to play it, get online, find a copy of the game, and spend the requisite $30 to buy it right now... Don't wait - - it's worth your time.

Now, if you have played it before, or if you just received it through Amazon Prime shipping and you are punching out the tiles, you know that this game is as homely as it is well-designed. With sketchy (literally) art, floppy card stock, and enough beige to make a medieval monk blush. Oh, and must I mention that the theme is as pasted-on as your novelty version of Monopoly? For as much craft and care was infused in the rules and tactics, very little emphasis was placed on the art design as if Mr. Feld truly didn't want anything beautiful to distract the players. Castles of Burgundy is as vanilla as it gets (but I believe that was intentional, even by early 2000s game art standards).

Fast forward twenty or so years to 2022. Art standards and production values continue to surge upward. Kickstarter, Gamefound, and other crowdfunding sites are replete with games that feature meticulously molded figures, vivid card art, and high-quality paper with just the right rigidity and thickness. One would be hard-pressed to find any (successful) game on a crowdfunding site that does not boast incredible illustrations and highly detailed miniatures. Likewise, established game producers like Asmodee, Z-Man Games, and Gale Force Nine Games (I'm kind of excluding Queen Games and Alea/Ravensburger here... They sometime err on the side of bland) undeniably pursue artistic excellence when it comes to board games. Conversely, I can only imagine the number of games that may have some ingenious mechanics or brilliant game design that end up falling to the wayside because the designer (possibly Queen Games or Alea/Ravensburger) did not have the business acumen or foresight (which would be mildly ironic for a strategic game designer not to predict marketplace failure) to hire an artist who was not her cousin or dodgy neighbor with a community college arts degree (not to denigrate people with community colleges). To state it simply, in the world of board games, art tends to cover the warts of mediocre game design much more than superior game design obfuscates cheesy drawings.

In any case, that is not the precise point of this article, though the point is still relevant. Actually, I am looking at those board (and card) games that possess an affable quality -- a certain je-ne-sais-quoi --that I can only identify as "cute." If you saw these kinds of games, you'd know what I am talking about. Here's a classic example: Carcassonne. Yeah, that tile-laying game with the "meeples" that, for a time, became ubiquitous as other games appropriated these pieces. There is just something so adorable about putting a meeple on a bucolic field tile as if it is having a rest. If you look closely at the tile, you might spy sheep frolicking in the countryside. Another cute game (in my estimation) is Boss Monster. I relish looking at those 8-bit-rendered heroes and villains; it sends me back to those days when I would play Legend of Zelda on my Nintendo, and then slam my controller down in frustration as Link died due to some suspect maneuver (Okay, calm down, calm down...). A lot of the Tiny Epic games are lovable with their tiny zombies, motorcycles, and weapons. Have you seen the illustrations of Belfort or Harbour (goodbye, Tasty Minstrel Games)? I even find the animeeples of Agricola scrumptious with those sheepish little sheep and the cows that look so at-home in your house (or in your Cooking Hearth).

There are a ton of examples of cuteness in board games, whether it is a small aspect of the game or a greater part of its design (Bunny Kingdom or Stuffed Fables, anyone?). Sadly, though, cuteness has a way of covering up the gangrene underneath... Okay, that's a bit extreme, but it is similar to the point I made earlier: beauty covers up poor game design (perfume on a pig?) much more effectively than great game design covers up blandness. Some games can win you over with something that you could figuratively hug and squeeze with overflowing affection. It is only when you have purchased such a game, unpacked it, and played it to realize that you have been seduced by cuteness. So, what do you do if a game is just so adorable? Here are my tips...

If you haven't bought it, research it.

This is a no-brainer, but sometimes we have to pause, take a beat, and think about the game. There are quite a few games that look great on the store shelf. You may examine the board game box and feel drawn to a bunny or a teddy bear on the cover. Look up the game on Board Game Geek immediately on your smartphone (Does anyone still have dumb phones? If so, I salute you!). Read a few reviews. Then, convince yourself that the cute game is not that great. When all else fails, take a picture of that lovable element on the box, print it, frame it, and hang it in your game room as a trophy signifying your ability to overcome a questionable decision.

If you already bought it, be open to liking it.

I know there are folks out there that would have no compunction about listing cute games on eBay after one play, but I recommend playing the game a few times to determine truly if you do not like it. Just because a game is not "good" does not mean that you would not like it. If you browse Board Game Geek's website enough, you may discover numerous reviews for pretty, yet perfectly mediocre games. Let's face it: if the game is adorable enough, you might find it in your heart to overlook its flaws and embrace the art.

If you bought the game and just loathe it, consider this...

What about keeping the "cute" part of the game and discarding the rest? Maybe you can cannibalize the tokens for another game, cut the pages or cards you like and make a fun scrapbook, or even make up your own rules. I have heard stories of people rewriting the rules for a game or creating a new game with parts from another. Personally, I have been known to take the gorgeously detailed coins out of one game and use them for another.

***

Ultimately, to quote some random Star Wars character, "do not be seduced by the Dark side." A lot of game producers put great effort, time, and market research into crafting games that people would buy. If they are truly smart, they do their best to capture the "casual" gamer; if they can convince the "average" consumer that a cute game is a must-have item, then the game producer has done well and can be gainfully employed. She can spend her earnings at Starbucks or pay next month's rent. And, in a way, you can feel good that you have helped a starving game designer survive one more month.

When it comes down to it, game design and production is a business and people are just trying to feed themselves and/or their families, so the workers in this industry endeavor to sell games, even if they are duds with a pretty coat of paint. Be discerning, take a breath, and allocate times towards researching. I told my sons the same thing about dating: instead of jumping into a relationship, observe, take the time to know the girl, and pray. Of course, if you can ignore the warts and psychoses, maybe a "cute" game is all you need. Just be prepared to deal with a lot of baggage (am I still talking about dating?).

What to Do If... You Want to Buy Yet Another Board Game

Imagine the scene: it is a gorgeous Saturday afternoon and three of your board game buddies visit you at your house. Your wife and kids are at a relative's house, so you have the house completely open. After the cursory hellos and opening refreshments, everyone meanders somewhat swiftly to your dining room table to play a somewhat complicated, but richly-thematic, board game. After a 15-minute explanation by the owner, you and your friends engage in what turns out to be a very enthralling round of gaming. Excited by the discovery (though mindful of your usual, well-known pattern of purchasing every board game you remotely enjoy), you remember the game, about which you cannot stop talking with your friends. The day ends on a high note as your buddies conclude a session with another intriguing, but somewhat less absorbing, board game.

Shortly after the last friend leaves, your family returns home. Without hesitation, you share your gaming experience with your wife, who rolls her eyes as if to say, "You want ANOTHER board game?"

...To which you quietly nod, as if communicating telepathically, "Yes!"

Whether you are a man or woman, you have probably experienced a similar exchange with your spouse; such is the life of an enthusiast of any hobby -- in this case, an enthusiast of board games. Yet, another scenario often plays out: you acquire the wonderful game only to attempt to teach your family or another group of friends and encounter a markedly non-positive response. They just do not like it. Now, you are stuck with a game that nobody else enjoys in your immediate social circle and your only chance of ever playing it again would be if you reconvened the original group, which (for whatever reason) is a very occasional occurrence. To augment your nascent depression, your spouse often (but lovingly) reminds you of how your hobby has once again led you to possess another fancy paperweight/shelf decoration/space-taking white elephant. 

...This may also sound familiar.

If it is not obvious, I have purchased games my family does not like more than once. This experience motivates me to spare you that same fate. I shall share some questions I ask myself whenever I am exposed to a game that I am tempted to buy. I must admit that thought I often refrain from making a frivolous acquisition, I do succumb to the occasional purchase.

What is appealing about this game?

Whether it is because of theme, mechanics, popularity, or even the fun time you had playing this game with your gamer friends, it is extremely helpful to identify, isolate, and analyze the reasons why the game appeals to you. These reasons help in answering the questions after this one.

What games do I already have that are similar to this one?

Compare the game you want to buy with the ones you have in your collection. If you have games of a similar theme, figure out what differentiates this potential purchase from the games you own. If you have games with similar mechanics, determine if the other factors differentiate the potential purchase enough to justify buying it. I have ruled out a few games because they were almost the same as games I already had. You also have to resist the "cult of the new" temptation of buying something simply because it is novel; new becomes old really fast, so a game should have more to it than just being new.

How often will I play this game?

For those folks that are relative rookies in the board gaming hobby, you will most likely play your modest inventory of games often. However, for those who have been in the hobby for more than a few years, every new purchase may take time away from your other games. This is affected by other factors: the expected time-per-player number, the complexity of the game, the amount of players the game accommodates, and the whether a game involves turn-based or simultaneous play represent aspects of games that can affect how often a game is played. If you have a bevy of 3-4-player games and the new one is in that player count, the new game may compete with the others for time. If the new game is a short one (say, 30-60 minutes maximum), it may slot into a gaming night agenda with other games. Cogitate seriously about how often you can play the new game, especially in light of the next question...

Will this game take away from time spent on the other games I own?

The tragic irony of any hobby is that the more you buy new things, the less you use the older things, and board games are no different. This is evident a few years after you become an enthusiast; you start out buying gateway games like Ticket to Ride or Pandemic, but as you acquire more games, you find that you are playing those gateway games much less. Eventually, the games you purchased 10 years ago only come out when you happen to invite casual players to your gaming parties or lunchtime gatherings.

Another situation you may encounter is when you play a beloved game less and less because of the other games; you would love to set up that beloved game, but you find yourself drawn to the more recently-bought ones. When you consider that new game, think about how often those old games will get played and if you even care. If you care, you may want to ponder how much you want the new game.

What games would I offload to make room for this one? Whether you have a vibrant local community of gamers to whom you can offer and sell your old games, you are an avid eBay user who markets your games, or an extremely generous friend who offloads games onto unsuspecting friends and family members, ridding yourself of old games creates space in your inventory, which may facilitate that new purchase. Opening up slots in your gaming shelf also addresses the previous questions; by eliminating certain games, you create more time play the new game while possibly erasing games with similar themes or mechanics from your collection. If you are not a seller or giver, though, the next question is crucial...

Would my family or friends really play this game?

Let us imagine that you have gotten this far in reflecting on why to buy that intriguingly novel game. Even though you have games that are strikingly similar to this new one, and you are perfectly fine with apportioning time to your other games while accommodating this game in your group's playing schedule, you have to ask yourself the most essential question of if your family and/or friends will play this game at all. Some may argue that even playing ONE time is justification enough; think about how four matinee tickets to a movie can set you back $28, which can also be the price of a game on sale and you will understand that point. Others may argue that they have multiple gaming groups and the new game will address one or more of those groups; if so, then buy it without any reservations.

Yet, I really recommend asking yourself honestly if your primary group is going to play the game. My primary group is my family; sadly, as the years have gone by and my sons have become teenagers who are NOT that interested in board games, there is much less enthusiasm to play games in my house. I have had to accept the harsh reality that unless I find a consistent gaming group, I would be hard-pressed to condone acquiring new games. If you are facing that reality, or an analogous one that may involve the dissolution of your gaming group or the common life changes that draw your gaming buddies away from the table (e.g. marriage, new baby, new job, and so on), then buying games may not be reasonable.

For game collectors: some people love to acquire new games just to put on their shelves and enjoy the mere fact of owning them. To those folks, I thank you for supporting the hobby. This article largely does not apply to you, particularly if you have the spare income to engage in collecting board games. Keep in mind, of course, that few games appreciate in value as collector items. Sure, if you own the first edition of the Dune board game in Near-Mint condition or some other limited edition, then you could most likely turn a nice profit compared to the original purchase price.

Outside of those exceptions, board games are generally not collectibles that rise or fall in the secondary market (in my experience) like baseball cards or comic books. Despite that, if you like buying beautiful games that instill that pride of ownership (and you are buying comfortably within your family's budget), then feel free to exercise your rights as a consumer.

***

I consider the thought process of whether or not to purchase a game as an algorithm that can either spare you from needlessly spending thousands of dollars or (in a few cases) complicate the buying process enough to dissuade you from buying anything. Nowadays, as a 10-year veteran of the hobby, I walk into board game stores and either buy expansions, card sleeves, or nothing at all because I really want to play the games I already own. Whenever I am tempted to buy, I run the algorithm through my mind. Ultimately, I do enjoy buying board games, which is a tendency that is turning me more into a collector than a player, which is somewhat tragic. It is like buying nice tools just to mount on a garage wall, or buying a sports car just to wipe it occasionally with a cheese cloth and gawk at it; indeed, having it is pleasurable, but I am not allowing the item to serve its purpose. That leads into grander questions about art and decoration; why have such things in your house if all they do is sit there? To that, I say this: isn't life better when your home environment is just a little prettier? If you elevate (or reduce?) board games to art or decoration, then no amount of questions can really stop someone from buying that odd board game once in a while.

What to Do If... You're Not Good at Board Games

Full disclosure: I'm not that great at board games. When I used to have regular board game club meetings at a previous company, I kept track of each game and how each player placed. Overall, I averaged a place of 3.5, which put me between third and fourth place. Sure, sometimes, I managed to win a game, but, more often than not, I was an also-ran. To be fair, I often had to teach the games I brought, which meant I was distracted and found myself demonstrating moves more than choosing the best move. That notwithstanding, when it came to games with which my group was familiar, I did not win so many.

Of course, over the years, my enthusiasm for the hobby has compelled me to read articles about strategies and tactics for specific games and for games in general. I have also played a wide array of titles running the full gamut of diverse game mechanics, and I've faced numerous opponents from which I learned much. Yet, I'm not that great at board games.

I'm just fine.

What do you do if you are not good at board games? I must admit that this is something I'm figuring out even now, but I would like to share with you my thoughts and what has helped me improve. First, here are the obvious solutions:

Read Game Articles
The first tip is one I already mentioned: search for your favorite games and you will find articles from both professional and amateur writers. Many articles are penned by enthusiasts on sites such as Board Game Geek, but some are posted by writers on video or board game sites. Though many of these articles are reviews that discuss basic rules and win conditions, you can glean key points, such as general strategies,  rules that can be exploited to create favorable game conditions, and even a few of the common paths too victory. More importantly, you can more easily find those games that suit you either from a mechanical or a thematic standpoint.

Play Games that Cover Well-Known Mechanics
If you browse Board Game Geek long enough, you may discover such mechanics as "worker placement," "area control," "deck management," "deck builder," and so on. These terms may be new or familiar to you, but if you seek the exemplars of each mechanic type, you can improve your overall gameplay. An acceptable place to start is with gateway games: Ticket to Ride covers route-building and set collection, Carcassonne (or Kingdomino) involves area control, Stone Age incorporates worker placement, and Settlers of Catan is an amalgam of set collection, negotiation, and area control. Beyond that, there are Next Step games like Dominion (deck-building) and 7 Wonders (hand-passing) that can provide the learner a grounding. By playing these games, you learn the winning tactics for mechanics that prevail in hundreds, even thousands, of games out there. Consider this: strip away the theme of a game and you may find that a lot of games are very similar (did I say that?).

Learn a Few Games Really Well
You can also assume the approach of learning a few games deeply, even taking a scholarly approach toward absorbing the vagaries of those games. One striking example of this is chess, which has an innumerable amount of books and articles dedicated to analyzing the game and the matches played by its very best players. Even modern games like the aforementioned gateway games and long-lived staples like Agricola, Puerto Rico, Twilight Struggle, and Castles of Burgundy have much material that you can research and play. In any case, as you dive more into your game of choice, you pick up on the rhythms of play and what combinations work.

Ask Questions In the Local Store or Online
Sometimes, the shopkeeper or locals at your friendly neighborhood game store can be an exceptional source of information about certain games, especially ones that are demonstrated or played there. If you are inclined to be social, visit the store and ask questions. I recommend starting with the shopkeeper, who may know about the game you want to learn. In addition, you can post questions on websites like Board Game Geek. With the panoply of posts on Board Game Geek, you have enough fodder to occupy you for months just to dissect one game.

Watch Games or Play-through Videos Online
This one's obvious, so I won't dwell on this suggestion, but I do recommend examining several channels on YouTube or any other video site before giving up. Note that there are a lot of sub-par game channels and commentators who do nothing to help, so try out several channels or shows before finding a channel that helps you learn a game.

Join a Group of Enthusiasts...
Just as chess scholars focus their time and energy on that game, you can specialize in any game, particularly ones that boast a robust player community with (or without) tournament structures. Keep in mind that most players in these groups are experienced and competitive, so your insertion into, and involvement in, these groups largely depends on a combination of the kindness and inclusivity of the members and your tolerance for their social shortcomings (i.e., you may have to put up with trash talkers or jerks).

... Or Start Your Own Enthusiast Group...
If you are averse to spending your precious time with strangers and/or possible ne'er-do-wells, then gather a few of your interested friends to commit to playing one game week-in and week-out. One example about which I've heard is Agricola (or Caverna for the more modern gamers); there are groups that meet consistently just to play Agricola because the game start is highly variable with a plethora of different occupation and minor improvements decks to use or even mix. The most significant advantage of starting a group with your own hand-picked friends and acquaintances is that you can rest assured people will (generally) relate well.

... Or Even Play Solo
There are probably hundreds of games that you can play on your own (even though board setup for a game you are playing alone may dissuade you from doing it), and there are even tablet versions of games that you can play to acquaint yourself with the games better. However, you may not have realized that ANY game can be a solo game if you're willing to play as more than one player. Much like boxers using shadow boxing as a training method, you can pick up on game intricacies playing against yourself.

Now, let's discuss the nitty-gritty:

Know a Game's End Conditions
Whenever I teach a game, I make sure to cover game-ending conditions because players need to know how a game can end (or be forced to end). Players are often surprised at how quickly a game has ended because they were not cognizant of the end conditions. This surprises me, in turn, because I commit an appreciable amount of time to explaining the end conditions, but even I forget from time to time. By knowing the end conditions, you can control the tempo of a game; just think inductively about the events that lead to the end and either make them happen sooner or later.

Know a Game's Win Conditions
Whenever I teach a game, I also cover win conditions because players need to know what is required to win. To become better at a game, you must know how to win; this informs all of your in-game decisions. This is not overstating the obvious; I am usually shocked when people do not spend the time to acquaint themselves with how many possible ways they can win. You also have to consider how win conditions do not always mean end conditions; just because you end a game early does not mean you win, so know the differences between the two types of conditions.

Understand Your Pieces
Take stock of the in-game items and tokens you have at the start of the game. What can they do? More importantly, how can each item expedite reaching the win or end condition of a game?

Consider How Your Starting Position Differs from Others
In some games, each player has abilities that are unique compared to other players; usually, these asymmetrical powers bend a game rule or provide some kind of advantage. Know how your abilities differ from your opponents and exploit the difference. Also, know how your opponents can accomplish feats you cannot. Instead of trying to beat your adversaries using their strengths, attack their weaknesses with your strength.

Look for Powerful In-Game Interactions
Whether it's card combinations, sequences of chosen actions, or even how different player abilities intermingle, study how you can use game elements in combination to create advantageous turns of play. Remember that though one card or ability may be highly effective in isolation, look for ways to boost the effect with another card or ability. Then, write down the combo and research it after the game is over.

Interfere with Players Only at Key Moments
There are aggressive game players out there who seize every opportunity to interfere with other people's plans. Conversely, there are players who, though not necessarily passive, are more patient and wait a bit too long to act. This is more easily said than done, but try to balance executing your plan with obstructing your opponent. For example, in Ticket to Ride, there are "choke" routes where, if taken by someone else, a short connection between two cities can be blocked, compelling one or more players to find a way around the choke point. Identifying these one- or two-car routes and taking one or two turns to play trains on these routes can stymy an opponent's efforts to connect. Look for such moments in the game. It may take a session or two to discover them; when you do, catalog them in your mind for future plays.

Find the "Broken" Card/Token/Item and Exploit It
Occasionally, a game might feature one or more items that afford you a profound advantage over the other players. When that item appears, emphasize acquiring it. Do not worry about how fair or unfair the item is - if it's supported by the rules, use it.

Maximize the Actions You Take Each Turn
Many games rely on an action mechanic that involves taking one action per turn, but also allows for more actions depending on specific conditions. One example of this is the X-Wing Miniatures Game, which affords each ship one action after the maneuver; yet, in that game, using linked actions or upgrades to increase your action economy creates advantageous situations for your pilots, especially if you can get a Focus token AND secure a lock in the same phase. Find in-game items or elements that allow for multiple actions when players normally take one. By doing so, you optimize your action economy while your opponent flounders in keeping up.

And, For the Nice Players Out There... Strive to Win!
One of my quirks (failings?) as a game player (besides the fact that I usually have to teach people while playing AND keep the rules straight for everyone, which makes me prone to making poor decisions for the sake of educating others) is that I don't like watching people lose. Maybe it's because I hate the feeling of losing and empathize with people when they feel it, or maybe it's because I like spending time with happy people. What I try to consider always is that when someone is playing a game against me, I create the best experience for him by playing to the utmost of my ability and aiming to win. This makes the game challenging for your opponent, who most likely wants to be challenged. If you happen to be a kind and gentle person, the most wonderful gift you can give your opponent is trying to beat him or her. People DON'T have fun when their opponents are pushovers. In this way, to be truly loving, you have to destroy your opponent!

I'm sure there are other tips out there for the quasi-mediocre player who wants to improve their gameplay. I just continue playing games and enjoy them as beautiful distractions that have stunningly-crafted pieces, gorgeous art, and multifariously complex rules and systems that one must labor to master. Each game is a journey that should be relished for what it is, win or lose. Then again, it does feel better to be victorious than to learn from defeat, even though the learning part has a more significant impact over time. Personally, being "just fine" at games is fine enough for me.

What to Do If... You Don't Want to Play Gateway Games (But You're Playing with Casuals)

As a board game enthusiast, it can be challenging to play with people who aren't enthusiasts. Such folks are often called "casual players" or just "casuals." It's a term that is somewhat pervasive in American vernacular when discussing people who only engage in an activity occasionally. This is especially the case with board games because most people do not pursue this hobby with the kind of passion to drive them to play regularly. However, for the board game enthusiast, herein lies the rub: more often than not, you get a hankering to play a board game (particularly a somewhat complicated one), but the only people that are readily available are casuals, whether they're co-workers, friends, or family members, so you assume the challenge of teaching casuals how to play a reasonably difficult game. Of course, many of us know how this ends: lots of blank expressions, yawns, head scratches, and a general desire for the casuals to extricate themselves from this train-wreck game session as expeditiously as possible.

This scenario is not uncommon, and it is one I've encountered several times, but what undergirds these situations is that apparent gap of interest and understanding between the enthusiast and the casual. Thankfully, unlike with sports in which differences in ability can result in lopsided victories and un-fun to be had by all parties, board games exist at varying levels of complexity. Among board gamers, games that are somewhat strategically rich and a cut above Monopoly are called "gateway games" with simple rules, short setup, and a sense of agency that differs greatly from the likes of Candy Land and Chutes and Ladders, to be sure. Games like Ticket to Ride, Carcassonne, Pandemic, and Settlers of Catan inhabit this ideological space of gaming. Now, don't get me wrong; these games are fun and a credit to the hobby, but there are times when the board game enthusiast wants more out of the gaming session than these games, which leads me to the crux of this article.

Here are some approaches you might try if you have a group of casual players, but do not want to play gateway games:

Research and Buy a New Game
If you navigate to Board Game Geek, you can view lists of how enthusiasts rate games. One list that is relevant to the kinds of games that casuals may enjoy is the Family Games list. On that list, you will find the classic gateway games, as well as some of the newer titles. My advice with this list is to find 3-5 games that catch your fancy and read reviews about them. They may be games that are less complex than what you truly desire, but you may find some gems that both are new to you and satisfy your urge for something more than gateway games.

Besides Board Game Geek, I recommend visiting Target, Barnes & Noble (if you're in the United States), or even the local board game specialty store. At Target, browse the "Strategy Games" section; at Barnes & Noble, browse the titles and find one that is thematically and mechanically appealing; and, at your local game store, ask the counter person (or owner) about their recommendations.

If you do NOT want to buy a new game...

Make Your Shortlist
In your existing collection, rule out the gateway offerings that you may have, but also think about your experiences with each game and consider your personal assessment of their levels of difficulty. Then, cull down all of the initial candidate games to a list of five to seven games that you would really like to play.

Look at Time and Player Count
Then, without much thought, examine your list while looking at only two criteria: time to play (which is sometimes calculated as a minutes-to-player ratio) and player count. Player count is important because you have to accommodate your entire group of casual-player friends, but expected time of play for each player is not necessarily crucial as a determinant for the length of your game session as much as an indirect indication of complexity; basically, the longer the game, the more complex it might be. This isn't a foolproof method of checking complexity, but this metric does give you some idea.

Determine the Game's Complexity
The beauty of gateway games is that though they are strategically rich, they are not painfully complicated. Many of these games have simple rulesets. For example, Carcassonne's turn order is easy to grasp: draw a tile, place one of your tile's edges against a compatible edge, and then choose whether or not to place an available worker on a feature of that tile. Once you understand the scoring of each feature, especially end-game farmer scoring, the mechanics of the game aren't daunting. Of course, the richness of Carcassonne lies in the discoveries players make as they gain experience. I suggest aiming for games that harness this beauty; at the very least, choose games that have a repeatable turn order and provide a reference card or sheet to help players along the way.

Consider The Number of Interwoven Mechanics
Working from the assumption that you are a board game aficionado, you are most likely aware of the mechanics of each game that you own. Is a game a deck-builder? Is it a worker-placement game? Does it involve set collection? Are there push-your-luck elements? Inherently, each identifiable game mechanic is no more intricate than any other mechanic, but some are more pervasive among casuals; for instance, set collection is a common mechanic found in many basic card games. However, I often keep in mind how many mechanics function inter-connectedly. Take Lewis & Clark; this game involves hand management and hand-building, worker placement, resource management, and even a racing element. With all of these mechanics in motion, even experienced board gamers have some initial problems with understanding the flow. Try to choose games that minimize the number of mechanics that prevail. For help with this, look up any particular game on Board Game Geek to discover how many mechanic categories are ascribed to that game.

Check Out the Components
A simple rule of thumb I use is the fewer the number of types of components involved in a game, the less complicated it probably is. For example, a game that has tokens, ships, three decks of cards, cardboard chits, dice, a game board, AND additional game props is most likely an overwhelming experience for the casual. Yet, a game with a set of dice, player pieces, two decks of cards, and a game board may seem less threatening. There is no magic number for types of components, but I generally take mental stock of what items are included in a game to decide if a game would suit my group of casual players. Despite this, watch out for games that appear simple with few components, but have cards that serve multiple purposes (e.g., Twilight Struggle), more than four types of tokens, chits, cubes, and/or bits, asymmetrical player powers, random starting board states, or a combination of these concepts.

Ponder the Attractiveness of the Theme
Let's admit it: some things may seem boring to the casual player. Trading in the Mediterranean? It had better be a visually-stunning game. Stock market trading? It had better have a lot of yelling. Space or science fiction? Make sure your group likes sci-fi. When choosing a game, think about your casual friends and what they might like. When in doubt, stick to popular tropes (Marvel, Star Wars, Disney, Star Trek, Harry Potter, or the like) or themes that are reminiscent of themes that are currently popular.

However, I have found that certain themes can backfire. For instance, though Game of Thrones and other sword-and-sorcery shows are popular, the medieval fantasy milieu is NOT for everyone and may be a turn-off. During one session when I presented Shadows over Camelot to my group, one of my not-so-casual friends quipped that the game was TOO nerdy for him, as if his traumatic memories of Dungeons & Dragons (or any other fantasy-themed game) had infected his outlook on knights and wizards. Identifying these "backfire" themes can be difficult, so I recommend adhering to the basic approach of avoiding themes that have stigmas attached to them, such as fantasy or sci-fi. I'll admit it: though nerdiness is en vogue now, some of your non-gamer friends may have no interest in stereotypically "nerdy" genres. Consider themes that are more universally relatable, such as transportation, economics, or crime.

Head-Simulate the Session
After all of your analysis, try to put yourself in the minds of your casual-player friends. Imagine conducting the gaming session with them, taking into account the non-gamerness of each person; this is the essence of head-simulation. Would they enjoy this game? Would they spend too much time asking questions? Does the game become bogged down? By doing this, you can avoid some stolid game sessions that, consequently, convince your friends that board games are boring.

Go with Your Gut
Even if one of your shortlisted games passes the various tests I have posited, I strongly advise you to rely on your "gut reaction." Sometimes, there are intangible elements to weigh, including your own ability (or inability) to teach a particular game effectively, your own qualms against a certain game, or even your past bad experiences with that game. Your intuition (i.e. your gut) should suffice in considering these things. Ultimately, if you feel that a game just won't work for your casual friends, put it back on the shelf and move on to the next game.


The hardest thing for any board game enthusiast to do is to admit that board games are just NOT the way to go when it comes to entertainment for a particular evening. I have walked into many adult gatherings with my duffle bag of games in hand, ready to expose my friends to some truly wonderful creations, but deciding not to open my duffle after all. I try to read the room, sensing if the host would be open to me hijacking the party by declaring that I'm starting a board game. Or, if I'm the host, I might detect that "odd" desire of people to "just relax" and not want to use their brains for anything besides socializing. Sure, there are awesome social games that fit this crowd (such as Two Rooms & A Boom or One Night Werewolf), but this is an article about non-gateway games for casuals... Occasionally, the best thing to do is not to play; save the games for another day when the conditions are right.

What to Do If... You Don't Like Your Game Group Anymore

It can be an almost insurmountable challenge to assemble a great game group. Having to juggle and mesh personalities, game tastes, schedules, and even where to play can be exhausting. This is why people often compromise in one or more of those areas for the sake of just getting a game off the ground. You may find yourself going to the local game store and pulling together a collectible-card gamer, a role-playing gamer, a miniatures gamer, a Euro gamer, and a  good friend into your group and trying to make them play together. Or, you may have identified some interested casual players and formed a lunchtime gaming group. You may have even gotten some neighbors together in your apartment building or street and decided to be "neighborly" by having them over for games and food. In each of these cases, though, you probably compromised on game taste (the first example), schedule (the second example), or even how readily the people interact (all of the examples). For a while, these groups can function and may even develop into fine friendships, but there is always the chance that group relations can go sour or, in a less easy-to-explain way, one or more of its members (namely you) grow to dislike specific members or the entire group. In my case, I was once in a game group in which one of the members had a crass sense of humor that I found off-putting. I grew to dislike being around this person because he would crack a crude joke and I would have to adopt a stone-faced expression.

With that in mind, let's discuss what to do if you do not like your gaming group, and I am writing this from the assumption that you are the one who no longer enjoys being in the group, but you are not the organizer:

Get Busy
One of the most diplomatic ways to back out of a group is to simply fill your personal and/or work schedule with other appointments. For instance, if your game group plays on Tuesdays, set up a lunch date with your spouse or mandate a workout time for yourself. Then, tell the group that your Tuesdays are filled. However, some persistent members of the group might try to accommodate your change; to anticipate that, schedule out EVERY day with something, even if it's trivial. If you're busy, you're busy, but you don't have to provide much explanation beyond the "my schedule is packed now" excuse.

Become Inconsistent
Another diplomatic way to back out of a group is to become "flaky," meaning that you just decide to not show up sometimes. You could not show up every other week at first, and then make your appearances less and less frequent. Instead, go out for walks, make other friends, prioritize family time... There are a myriad of reasons to be inconsistent. The only risk is that you become the "flake," which means that people become distrustful of you attending organized events.

Pray and Endure
The hardest decision is to remain in a group because you want to be that positive person who invests in people. You may genuinely care about the people in your group, even though you do not really like them, because they are human beings who need encouragement. If this is the case, I recommend a lot of prayer and (for Christians) reading the Bible. Then, treat each game meeting as an opportunity to reach people. The only downside of this approach is that board games can become less fun and more like a job.

Now, if you happen to be the organizer of the game group sessions, then your options are slightly different and, in some ways, more difficult because your non-participation is much more apparent and can communicate feelings to the others that you would rather NOT make that obvious:

Stop Scheduling Sessions (Corollary to Get Busy)
There may come a time when you decide to NOT schedule the meetings anymore. At work, you may use Outlook to send invitations; just stop sending the invitations. Outside of work, you may communicate through social media or email; start off by sending cancellation notices, and then stop sending notices altogether. Eventually, someone will comment on how you don't organize meetings and ask why you don't. Simply tell them that you have "been busy," but encourage that person to take control and set up meetings. More often than not, if you're the organizer, other people will not step up when you leave a vacuum.

Announce a Break
Through whatever medium, inform your group that you want to take a break from board games to focus on other hobbies and/or family. Mention that you need to "recharge your batteries." You can also encourage the rest of the group to carry on without you. This is probably the second-most direct way (besides holding a special meeting) to communicate your displeasure with the group.

Hold a Special Meeting (Corollary to Pray and Endure)
If you prefer to be really direct, call the group together and (in a neutral location) discuss why you have a grievance with one or more members of the group. Consider the following scenarios...

If you all are friends, then conduct this meeting with the approach of preserving friendship. In other words, discuss your issues calmly and with an ardent desire to be inoffensive, read facial expressions, echo other people's feelings, and work together to find solutions for the issues. Friends are more important than games, so addressing the issues you have might resolve your lack of desire to play.

If you are all enthusiasts who are only unified by board games and a common night for gaming, then I do NOT suggest holding a meeting except to say that you won't be able to play on that day and time, but you encourage them to continue. If they are like the kinds of people I've met at the local game store, there will be no hearts broken by your bowing out for various reasons. Sometimes, it's best that people do NOT know the details or your grievances.

If your group is a work group comprised of acquaintances, then this kind of meeting is much trickier because you have to work with these individuals. I would NOT recommend a meeting AT ALL. Simply get busy and stop organizing or attending game sessions.

As I wrote this post, I considered the possibility that you may have identified another group to join. If so, I would back away from the current group and not join the new group for a while; give yourself one or two months before restarting gaming, or restart in a way that isn't apparent to the old group. Then, if someone from your old group discovers that you have joined a new group, mention that this group was better for your schedule, they are playing a game you wanted to try, or you were finally done with taking a break. You may want to take great care to meet with the new group in an entirely new location or different lunchroom.

Despite the ideas and advice I've put forth, I tend to find that if one does not enjoy a group, that group tends to fall apart quite organically. I believe that it has something to do with the concept of complex adaptive systems. Basically, if you take a room of people who have developed their own interactions and group norms but introduce a new person, the entire dynamics of the room change for better or worse. This happens in classrooms when new students join the class and that awesome class becomes a chaotic one; it also happens in small businesses when a misanthropic individual can throw interactions into disarray.

My point is that as your attitude towards the game group (even if you are subtle) becomes non-positive, that "vibe" is felt by those around you. They may not be able to pinpoint what is happening, but they may find themselves not enjoying the group either. Of course, I don't endorse throwing a fit or being overtly negative; that is not a suggestion I have made in this post. Instead, I proffer the idea that when one person in a group is no longer engaged, the group slowly, inexorably crumbles. With that in mind, either the patience to ride it out or the conviction to leave may be what you need to end what has become an unfavorable game group for you.

What to Do If... You Don't Remember (or Fully Understand) the Rules

Imagine that it's game night at your home. You've invited four of your best game buddies to join you in learning a somewhat complicated game like Power Grid. All of your buddies have some experience with board games and even own some of their own, so you anticipate a not-so-steep learning curve. With this in mind, you spent a little time reading the rules, skimming sections because you have to commit time to actually cleaning your living room and bathroom (personal note: please clean your bathrooms before game day; your guests will quietly thank you for it).

Anyway, your guests arrive. Wisely, you already had the board and components laid out on the table and the rules ready for easy reference. After a few appetizers and drinks, you invite your friends to sit as you explain the rules. At first, people are comprehending and nodding their understanding. Yet, partway through the explanation, you stumble. What was that rule about cycling in new power plants? Is it last-to-first place turn order during bidding or during the connection of cities? As you feverishly rifle through the rulebook, you lose your place and your guests' collective attentions begin to wander. You spend five minutes reading through each phase of the game until you think you have a firm grasp of the game flow, which prompts you to restart your explanation... until you realize that you didn't quite understand the flow after all. After that, it's all sweaty palms, reading, and your guests turning on the TV to watch reruns of Last Man Standing...

This scenario is not a strange one. I would wager that almost all of you have experienced this when teaching a game you own. Getting stuck on misunderstood or forgotten rules, befuddling yourself on why certain game events happen, and even forgetting basic setup are not uncommon during the teaching of games. However, in this article, I want to focus on an aspect of rules that has needlessly stymied many a game session: not knowing certain rules OR forgetting rules. Here are a few tips and tricks I have for what to do if you don't remember (or understand) rules. These tips are not in any particular order:

Read the Rules Well Before Game Day
The obvious solution for not remembering rules is to read the rules long before you have your game day. I would suggest both reading the rules and playing a mock game on your own to acquaint yourself with the machinery of the game itself. For note-taking, you may want to print a separate copy of the rules that you can highlight and notate. Of course, if you don't mind marking up your rulebook, feel free to do so.

Read Forums and User Comments
Board Game Geek is a great online resource for acquiring more information about rules and frequently-asked questions. Read the comments pertaining to the game in question; I would even recommend bookmarking the URL for that game and having that handy before the event you are hosting, but a better solution would be to compile handy knowledge in a Word document or Excel spreadsheet.

Now, if you didn't do your homework and study the rules, then here are the tips for you:

Wing It (and Tell People You're Winging It)
When teaching a game, the worst thing, besides not knowing a rule, is taking an inordinate amount of time reading the rules while your friends languish in their semi-comfortable dining room chairs. I recommend skimming the rules, and then informing your guests that you are just going to start the game and proceed with your tenuous grasp of the rules. Tell your friends that you may make mistakes during the course of play, but you will adhere to the rules as you understood them at the start. Then, after the game is over, let people know what your mistakes were and how the game should be played. This sounds sloppy, but playing a game incorrectly and having fun is more important than getting mired in rules reading for an hour before you start the game.

Ignore Certain Rules
It is perfectly acceptable to excise rules from the game for the sake of starting the game and enjoying each other's company. For instance, some people play Carcassonne for the first time WITHOUT farmer scoring. Sure, this takes away a key part of the scoring process, but at least you introduce your friends to the concept of tile-laying and feature scoring. If you finish fast enough (note: Carcassonne games can take only 75 minutes if you play with the base set), then you can incorporate that rule you ignored.

Set House Rules
A variation of winging it is telling people that you are going to run a game with a certain interpretation in mind, which is basically setting house rules. For the sake of learning and starting a game, there is nothing wrong with this as long as people are made aware of it. Yet, if you set house rules on the fly while someone decides to read the rules during gameplay, he may feel cheated if he discovers that the rules state something different from your house rule.

In general, if you don't understand a rule in the moment, especially if you're reading and teaching at the same time, tell everything that you are going to proceed with a certain approach and ask for their consent. Be flexible, though: some people may disagree with your house rule, which is actually a great thing because they are now engaged in the learning process and may help you better execute that particular stipulation.

Play a Few Practice Turns and Reset
If you have several hours scheduled, you could play two or three demo rounds of a game for people to get a feel for the game while you work out your comprehension of the game. After you've identified pain points in the rules and negotiated with others to lay out how the game should be played, take a break, reset the board, and play the "real" session.

Learn Together
If you have a patient group of close friends, you may want to entreat them to read the rules with you and learn the game together. To do this, I recommend sending the rules to each of them by email or even message service, and then going through the rules in unison. With the right group, this learning session becomes a hangout in and of itself, especially for really involved and complex games. Some people relish these opportunities: if you identify these folks, hold on to their friendship with both hands!

(For Experts Only) Make Up the Rules!
Now, there comes a time when, despite your improvisational abilities, you cannot make out enough of the game's rules in the moment to develop a working understanding of the game that you can even communicate to your friends. It happens; you are not alone in these moments of confusion. Considering this, based on your experience with games, make up the rules!

An example of this was the first time I played Robinson Crusoe. In retrospect, Robinson Crusoe is not that complicated, but the rules are not the most clearly-written rules and do leave new players to a boatload of reading during gameplay, so I remember having to make up a rule about the in-game items that you can construct in which each item, unless explicitly stated, could be used over and over. For some reason, I was confused about whether items were used one time or able to be used repeatedly, so I just made up a rule. Indeed, you may end up perpetuating incorrect play, but remember: your goal is to guide your friends through a game by playing it and having fun. Do not get mired in reading and waiting.

Before I proceed, I should note that you must let people know that you are making up the rules because you do not want to perpetuate incorrect play. Doing so is like spreading a disease: you not only affect your friends, but they affect their friends. Even worse, once your friends discover your malfeasance, they will NOT trust you to teach another board game, so give your friends fair warning. Funnily enough, some of your friends may object to your making up rules and help you out by reading the rules for themselves.

When All Else Fails... Fall Back!
If you are not an expert on ad hoc rule generation or with tap-dancing through a rules explanation, you may want to declare that you need more time to learn the game and move on to a game that most of your friends know. Sure, you may have a friend or two that would be disappointed in not learning the new game, but sometimes simply playing any game is the best course of action.

Thanks to my direct influence, my two teenage sons own and play board games. My older son, who is 15, is less interested in board games than at least seven other interests, but he does play games to get out of doing homework and as a general diversion. As it does happen, he has moved beyond board games as a personal preference. Not so conversely, my younger son, who is 13, still likes receiving games as gifts and will opt on his own to play them with little prompting. I mention both of my sons because, despite their being at different points of what I call the "board game interest lifecycle," they have one thing in common: they both dislike teaching people board games because there is a lot of pressure to know and understand (almost) every rule. Thankfully, though, with the tips and experience I've shared, you can spend less time stressing out about rules explanations and more time enjoying your friends' company and, oh yes, playing the game you wanted to play. Your friends might even appreciate the game enough to read the rules, yell at you for the mistakes you made, and then demand that the game be played correctly next week. To me, in this case, everyone wins!

What to Do If... No One Wants to Play Your Game

Imagine this scenario: last week, a new game was released at your local game store. You had been excited to acquire it since seven months ago when the first press release announced its impending arrival. With great anticipation, you sped to the game store on the day of release and gobbled up the first copy (as well as all of the necessary card sleeves and containers for tokens, if you are anything like me). You spent a few hours sleeving cards, punching boards, and sorting the contents, relishing each component and piece of superlative artwork. You even found a place of great esteem on your game shelf for your new acquisition.

As you placed your shiny new box in its designated spot, your mind began racing. Who would I invite to play this game for the first time? Who would be available? Who would not be interested? Hurriedly, you bursted forth from your bedroom with notepad in hand, feverishly jotting down names. With your short list of would-be enthusiasts, you flung open your laptop computer, toggled to your email client software, and clicked New to create an email. You added the names, typed the message with urgent intensity, and clicked Send. Your email shot forth like a cannon blast. Then, you waited. And waited. And waited.

"Sorry, I can't play. I have to wash my dog."

"That game? No thanks. Why not play Power Grid?"

"That game looks way too complicated."

"My wife wants me to spend time with her."

"Ugh. I just bought a new game, too. Do you want to play that one?"

Obviously, the enthusiasm for your new game is decidedly low. You are despondent. You begin pondering your life goals. You resort to prayer. Things do not look good... What do you do? Well, there are solutions, some of which you may have already devised, but some might have escaped your attention.

Bring Your New Game to a Larger Gathering
From time to time, your friends might host a large gathering during which games can be played. Use that time to introduce yourself (if there are people who are strangers to you) and your game. Strangers are often the best people to whom you can introduce a game because they have no preconceived notions about you or what you brought.

Entice Your Friends with Food
The fastest way to a gamer's heart is through his stomach. Set up an invitation to play your particular game, and then advertise that you are providing pizza, burritos, or whatever your friends enjoy. This establishes a quid pro quo situation in which you are giving something (food) and getting something (opponents for your game) in return.

Enlist Your Captive Audience... er, Family
A great way to get your new game to the table is to make your family play it. Spouses are difficult to convince, but your children (or nieces and nephews) are impressionable, pliable, and usually more amenable to playing a new game than anyone else. Take to time to know the rules of your new game and practice teaching it to yourself so that you can prepare for training your children and young relatives.

Ultimatums!
A not-so-subtle variation of the quid pro quo arrangement is the ultimatum: "If you don't play my new game, I won't play yours next time!" Now, this kind of forceful declaration must be done with great care and humor, and can even be off-putting for your more thick-skinned friends, but a kind reminder that you are agreeing to play someone else's new game may compel your comrades to partake in your game. However, if they do not agree to play your new game despite your efforts to play theirs, then you may have to consider other options: patience, non-attendance to future sessions, or finding a new game group.

Find a New Group
As I mentioned in previous posts, they may come a time when you need to find a new game group. Of course, leaving your current group forever simply because they would not play your game is extreme and childish ("Fine! I'll take my ball home and you guys can't play with it!"), but their refusal to play your new game may be symptomatic of deeper issues. Perhaps someone in your group has an issue with you and his grudge has affected the group; maybe your group has collectively soured to each other's company. Instead of ditching your old group entirely, find another group at the local game store, at work, or at your church who would be open to meeting. It is fine to be a member of multiple groups, and looking for a fresh group of people with open minds has the ancillary benefit of creating chances to play your recent acquisition.

Be Patient and Plant Seeds
This may not seem like a solution because patience changes nothing in the moment, and it is the most difficult thing to do, but waiting for the opportunity and planting seeds of interest in your friends' minds is often the best approach. Some gamers like familiarity with a game, so they prefer playing a known game and not having to dive into rules explanations, which is why presenting a new game can be a daunting endeavor. For these folks, instead of the brute force tactic of forcing a game on your group, drop hints about it during your next play session. Spend a few weeks reading the rules and shoehorning comments about it every time you meet people in your group. Point out reviews on Board Game Geek or other sites. Talk about how the game's mechanics are like other popular games, but the theme of your game makes those mechanics feel fresh. The process may take a few weeks, but keep trying and, eventually, your gaming group will relent... even if it is to silence you at last.

Find Solo Rules Variants for Your Game
One of the many wonderful aspects of sites like Board Game Geek is the pooling of ideas that people have formulated on their own, especially solo variants for games. Though some games have rules for playing alone in the core rules (such as Robinson Crusoe, First Martians, Le Havre, and Agricola), most games do not benefit from this extra development on the part of the game designer. However, there are folks out there that have taken the time to devise a kind of artificial intelligence for your game so that tasks are essentially automated as if you are playing against a computer. Solo play does require much work on your part to move pieces, draw cards, and follow what can be complex algorithms simulating other players, but playing solo may be preferable to never playing your new game or doing what I am about to suggest...

Sell (or Store) the Game
The last resort is to either store the game and consider it a collectible, or sell the game on eBay or to other gamers. There is no point in keeping a game no one will play (unless you are content with collecting games), so consider selling it to buy expansions for games that your friends play. To avoid this altogether, though, even before buying a game, think about whether or not your friends and/or family will play it.

Before you attempt any of these solutions, there are a few requirements that you must satisfy:

• Learn Your Game
  Read the rules again and again before even attempting to introduce it.
• Practice Teaching the Game
  Brainstorm ideas of how you would teach the game and organize those ideas into a chronological outline. Use your outline to practice teaching the game, perhaps to a family member or just to yourself.
• Organize Your Components
  Have every component of the game organized so that they are easily accessed without wasting valuable game time hunting for them.
• Anticipate Player Counts and Set Aside the Requisite Components
  Some games' setups stipulate how much of any items you need for certain player counts. Instead of counting out tokens and cards at the start of the gaming session, use plastic bags to separate the required items beforehand so that setup is accelerated.
• Know the Comparable Games
  One thing that assuages fears of learning a new game is drawing parallels to existing games with similar mechanics. This further requires knowing your gaming group, but sticking with popular games helps. Here is one example: "My new game has a set collection mechanic, much like the way you collect cards in Ticket to Ride." Also, mentioning that similar games can be found at Target, Barnes and Noble, or other popular retailers sends the message that your new game is not that strange or difficult to learn because games like it are readily available.

Getting your game group to play your most recent purchase can be challenging and disheartening, but with some foresight and planning, you can mitigate this circumstance trying any of the solutions I mentioned. Usually, novelty is not so alluring for people; do not be insulted if your friends refuse to play your new game at the start. Entice, convince, entreat, bribe: there are yet more options you can pursue to help your game see the light of day.

Despite my suggestions, I believe that the best approach is thinking about your friendly opponents and what they would want before you buy a game. For me, I often think about my wife and sons: would they play the game I'm thinking of buying? A few years ago, my sons had the time and desire to play pretty much anything I bought, but now they are teenagers and their tastes have changed. My wife is much more selective, so I try to pick some games she would not mind playing. Also, because I no longer have to kind of gaming group I had at my previous job, I have to think about my old games and how often I can get them to the table; when I do think about that, I am often convinced to not buy a new game.

Furthermore, I encourage you to think about your current inventory of games and ponder how often you would like to play your existing games. The board gaming hobby is heavily steeped in a "cult of the new" mentality in which gamers are often excited to purchase the hottest novelties. This may be you, and if you have the money to engage in this, then I am happy for you. Yet, if you really enjoy your old games and would like to play them more often, reconsider that purchase you want to make. In this way, perhaps the best solution for what to do if no one will play your new game is to not buy that new game... Or, if you have already bought it, take it back to the store and buy some pizzas to tempt your friends and family to go to your house and play games with which they are already familiar.

What to Do If... Board Games Have Become Less Fun

Like most hobbies, table gaming (i.e. board and/or card games) is subject to the ebbs and flows of life. A table gamer may experience weeks, months, or even years of high-peak interest in his hobby, seeking consistent game sessions and new and exciting games to open, sort, and explore. Conversely, a table gamer may be overwhelmed with life changes, such as switching jobs, marriage, having children, moving to a new neighborhood, checking out an unfamiliar church, and so on. What is difficult to understand, though, is when one's interest in a hobby seems to wane for no significant reason. Though I would contend that there is always a reason, the underlying causes may be almost impossible to identify.

Nonetheless, there are ways to handle periods of your life during which, for one or many reasons, board games are just not as fun as they used to be or are not that fun at all. Some of these methods are painfully obvious, yet some of them may be unfamiliar to you.

Take a Well-Defined Break from Gaming

The simplest method for dealing with this malaise is to stop gaming for a while, though I would not recommend taking an open-ended break. I suggest taking a clearly delineated break by defining the start and end of the break. Call it a "fast" from gaming. The fast could be for 10 days, 20 days, one month, or even a few months. By defining the parameters of the break, you establish that mental barrier for which to aim. By fasting from gaming, you may regenerate that keen interest in the hobby, yet develop a healthier perspective of it. After all, gaming is a relatively minor hobby and should not override more important concerns, such as one's faith, or even family, job, and friends.

Explore Other Hobbies

Another obvious solution is to engage in other activities. I would suggest physical activities, like hiking or sports, to disconnect from the cerebral pursuits of gaming and exercise other areas of your brain.

Return to a Beloved Game from Your Past

One way to revitalize your interest in table gaming is to revisit a game from your past. These kinds of games I call recharger games. For example, I used to really enjoy playing Carcassonne with a few expansions, especially Inns and Cathedrals. By returning to a game from your past, you may rediscover those game-youthful feelings you may have left behind and forgotten. If you have been tempted to sell that old game, do not sell it; keep it as a reminder of your "younger" gaming days. If you sold that old game, I recommend buying it again and keeping it ready. Remember: just because you have "evolved" as a gamer does not mean you cannot enjoy those past gateway games that got you involved in the first place.

One more thing to mention: even opening up an old game and thumbing through its components may be enough to enjoy gaming again. Sometimes, I like to crack open Core Worlds just to look at the card art and read through the potential combos. That game is definitely one of my go-to recharger games.

Reconnect with an Old Game Buddy

Another way to rekindle your hobby fire is to call upon a game friend from the past. Be sure to call someone with whom you really enjoyed playing games. However, consider the possibility that the old gaming buddy has either moved on from gaming or has "evolved" into other games. Recapturing that wistful feeling of positive nostalgia may be only one-sided; factor that into the reconnection and you will frame the reunion with balanced expectations.

Buy (or Make) an Expansion

Occasionally, all you need is to shake up an old game with a novel expansion to renew your gaming spirit. However, I would extend this to a riskier idea: creating a home-brewed expansion. When I am a bit bored, I like to think about ways to tweak the existing rules by synthesizing new cards, game boards, and tokens. Playtesting these ideas can energize a gaming veteran by making her analyze the rules to find loopholes and advantageous combos that can be exacerbated or mitigated by a homemade expansion.

As an added bonus, there are a few methods that I would NOT recommend because these can be counterproductive:

DON'T Sell the Old Games...Yet

Selling old games does not solve the problem of loss of interest... unless the issue is not that. You may be selling games because you are absolutely no longer interested in table gaming OR you have elevated table games to an unhealthy level of interest such that you value them over truly significant parts of your life. Of course, if you are just in a lull, hold onto your old games until you are certain of your course of action.

DON'T Buy a New Game

Sure, it's exciting to buy new games, sort components, sleeve cards, and organize contents for a night-long session of gameplay, but I have found that this does not alleviate waning interest on a long-term basis; instead, it staves off the malaise for a short time. It also establishes a "cult of the new" pattern of thinking. In other words, you are only able to ward off boredom by buying new games. This is an expensive route with diminishing returns. As I have heard in so many movies, if you are not enough with the games you have, how can you be enough with a new game?

DON'T Seek New Game Friends with an Expectation of Renewing Interest

It may seem like an excellent strategy to try out a new gaming group, but the worst aspect of this method is that you may become further disillusioned trying to renew gaming interest with people you barely know or may not even like. This could backfire spectacularly because new players are an unknown quantity. For instance, if you are a competitive person who enjoys engaging in table talk (i.e. light trash-talking), but you join a group who shies away from such banter, you may end up further discouraged.

DON'T Play Your Way Through the Doldrums

Much like a lot of athletes, trying to play your way through a slump can worsen your negative sentiments because you start feeling like you are in a pit you cannot escape. However, this is not always true; sometimes, an unexpectedly exhilarating session of play may recharge you.

In general, when suffering through a downswing in gaming, I advise avoiding new situations, games, and opponents, and return to past games, opponents, and groups with whom you relished playing. Of course, this approach may not work for you; perhaps, something novel may energize you. New friendships can also inspire you to continue.

I should mention, though, that there is the danger of table gaming becoming that idol that one comes to worship, as if the hobby becomes so integral to one’s daily routine and thoughts that all other aspects of one’s life become secondary. Christians think in terms of “idols,” and I believe that this approach is a useful way to reassess what table gaming means to you. In fact, Philippians 4:19 offers intriguing insight in which Paul wrote of idolaters: their end is destruction, their god is their belly, and they glory in their shame, with minds set on earthly things. Does gaming dominate your thoughts and free time? Does most of your discretionary funds go towards it? If so, I strongly recommend taking a long break from table gaming and focusing on pursuing God. Such a pursuit realigns our perspectives, which, ironically, can enhance our enjoyment of any hobby. As is often overstated, table gaming can become “too much of a good thing.” In that sense, the best way to reignite gaming interest is to realign your priorities.

What to Do If... Your Family Does Not Like Board Games

It is not an uncommon occurrence to have a hobby that most or all of your family does not share. In my family of four, each of us has distinct (what I would call) "main hobbies." For instance, my wife derives a lot of pleasure from hiking and camping; though my sons and I enjoy these activities in varying degrees, they are primarily her hobbies. My oldest son is highly enthusiastic about Japanese car modification and performance, which informs what he reads and mentions daily. My youngest son is greatly interested in wilderness survival and warfare, which serves him well as a Boy Scout. My hobbies... well, my hobbies are running, watching movies, and board games, which are enjoyed or tolerated by the rest of my family. The key term, I should state, is "tolerate."

Every family tolerates its members' hobbies to some extent. In my family, we tolerate, or sometimes enjoy, each other's hobbies and interests. My youngest son is the most flexible: he seems to enjoy camping, cars, AND board games. My oldest son tolerates everyone else's hobbies (which is endemic to being a teenager, I suppose). My wife is intrigued by wilderness survival (my youngest's interest) and puts up with board games from time to time. I glean some enjoyment from camping and hiking and can talk enough about cars to be mildly useful in a conversation. In any case, toleration (NOT endurance or long-suffering) is the operative term.

What happens, though, when your family does NOT like your hobby, specifically, for the purpose of this article, board games? For various reasons, one or more family members may not find any appeal in board games. Whatever the reason, there are ways to turn the situation to your favor. As with any hobby, there are methods and approaches that may change your family's minds about board games. As a thought exercise, let us explore some of those approaches...

Assess Your Family's Interests
One of the most difficult things to do is to involve anyone into one's own hobby because this often requires tweaking one's hobby to accommodate others. Find out in what each of your family members is interested. Let these hobbies drive which games you choose and purchase. This may force you to branch out beyond your own gaming tendencies, such as when one of your children or siblings is interested in fashion; you would probably never head in that direction with board games, so you may have to stretch yourself to accommodate it. Thankfully, nowadays, there are an innumerable amount of games for any theme that exists.

Enlist Competition and Theme
With board games, there are two characteristics that are universally understood enough to fold in many people: competition and theme. In this way, you can connect their interests to board games. For example, if one family member is a sports enthusiast, consider board games that are competitive or cooperative, depending on that person's disposition. You cannot generalize by assume that all sports-minded folks are competitive, so assess his or her disposition. Another example is if a family is interested in cars, like my oldest son; find a game that involves that theme. However, be careful to research the game; some games may appear to have a car "theme," but it may just be a pasted-on theme that acts as a veneer for a bunch of game systems and mechanics. In any case, theme and competition are two avenues by which you can bring in semi-apathetic people.

Be Fair with Everyone's Hobbies
Before launching full-bore into board gaming with those semi-apathetic members of your family, discuss with them your desire to balance everyone's hobbies to ensure that nobody's interests are ignored. To engender intrigue in board games, you must consider your family. This also involves stretching yourself to engage in pastimes that are not your own. In my family, every Friday is Family Night, and each week one person decides what to do on that night. In this way, everyone has a chance to expose others to their hobbies. In order to ensure that board games have some kind of place in your family, I recommend enjoying other people's hobbies, which makes everyone feel included, thus engendering a probable desire to engage in your hobby of board gaming.

Relax
For board gamers, any game is a serious pursuit. Whether it is a gateway game like Ticket to Ride or Settlers of Catan, or a thinky, involved game like Agricola or Twilight Struggle, avid board gamers are fascinated to the extent that even the finer rules and mechanics of such games attract their undivided attention. Non-gamers and casual gamers, though, are not so intense; based on what I have observed, it is the light, social aspects of games that draw them into any game. Thus, I recommend keeping any family game session light with an extreme emphasis on fun. Do not focus on the mechanics of the game, and do not be quite so strict and fastidious with the rules; simply play the game to interact with your family. Patience is also key; your family may ask numerous questions throughout the game that you would be tempted to answer by handing them the game manual to read; do NOT do this! Just relax and take time to explain the rules. If you are calm and non-intense, everyone else will associate calmness and non-intensity to games... at least until they (may) form their own strong interest in board games.

Look at Board Games as Conversation Starters
If anything, games are "social lubricants" which fill conversation gaps and slip past people's protective shells by alleviating the pressure to talk about oneself; use that element of board games by approaching rules explanations like opportunities to talk. Also, use board game time as a chance to discuss other people's hobbies. Sure, a fantasy-themed dungeon crawl may have nothing to do with camping, unless you work hard to make the connection and then discuss it. This is where you have to stretch yourself even further to not view board games as chances to compete or escape the real world, but as chances to ground yourself in the realities of your family members.

Seek Honest Assessment of the Board Games You Choose
This is the toughest requirement: ask your family which of your games they liked. Sometimes, you may be surprised that one or more of your siblings or children enjoyed Power Grid, even though it seemed long and thinky when you last played it. Sometimes, though, you may NOT be surprised that they did not enjoy that three-hour session of Lewis & Clark and how the winner had run away with the victory 30 minutes before you actually finished the game. Assessing your family's interest in your games can be a sensitive matter because, even though you really enjoy certain games in your collection, they may not like your beloved games at all! What do you do in this instance? There are two solutions: consign certain games to sessions with your gamer group only, or sell the games to acquire ones that better fit your family. The former is easier, yet you would have to live with the fact that you would play those games much less often; the latter is tough, but may serve as an opportunity to acquire newer, more streamlined games. In other words, by assessing your family's tendencies, you can craft your game collection to include them.

I am sure there are many more ideas regarding how to enfold your family into board gaming, but just as toleration is key to your family enjoying each other's hobbies, it is incumbent upon you to stretch yourself to accommodate your family. In this way, the answer to what to do if your family does not like board game is simple yet extremely arduous: you have to be self-sacrificial, which is, sadly, an odd concept where one's hobbies are concerned. It does not have to be odd, though. By giving up some of your tendencies, you include others and become a better person for it because board games become less about rules, mechanics, and theme, and more about conversation, inclusion, relaxation, and fun.

This reminds me of a great Bible verse: There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends (John 15:13). With our hobbies, we should do no less -- lay down our own interests for our friends and family. That may involve playing games you would not play on your own or playing less than you would want. Yet, I believe that if you accomplish this, you elevate board games to something better than a personal hobby; it becomes something that binds the family together. I think every hobby should achieve this.